peregrintoolc:

I’m thankful for all the different ways I can eat potatoes

grimybear:

i know i give white people a lot of shit but u guys are really nice. like when the light turns green and there’s a white pedestrian that’s almost across the street u guys always do that jog thing. i know it’s kind of insignificant but i appreciate it white people. u and ur half jog thing.

politedoge:

when you’re in a group project and you’re the only one doing work

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dicksplit:

Being the leader in a group project

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britneyinventions:

2014jordyn:

britneyinventions:

Britney Spears always wanted a little sister and hated the fact that the female reproductive system was only capable of producing one female offspring in a lifetime, so she began to research the causes of this phenomenon. She discovered in 1988 that women had more than one egg with a X chromosome but they wouldn’t drop during ovulation after the first daughter was born. Spears developed a technique the following year, referred to as in vitro fertilisation, to remove X chromosome eggs from the ovaries to produce a female zygote outside of the mother to be placed inside her at a later time. In 1990 Lynne Spears, Britney’s mother, allowed Britney to perform this procedure on her and on April 4, 1991, Britney Spears had successfully invented Jamie Lynn Spears, the first little sister.

I’m really confused because there are females with little sisters all over the world

All thanks to Britney Spears. God bless.

cyclopentanone:

when you have to go around the circle and introduce yourself to the group

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stockphotomodel:

fvkstyles:

"Get in the car princess, daddy’s taking you shopping."

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"Daddy’s has to work hard today so he can spoil you later."

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"That’s right baby doll, swing the mallet just like daddy showed you."

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"I’m in a rush little one, whatever you want just charge it to daddy’s credit card."

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darvll